First Date

 

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“Mom he bought me flowers. Flowers.”  Photo by PHUOC LE on Unsplash

The young man standing in the door was a handsome boy and when he saw my daughter walking towards him he broke out into a huge smile. From behind him, he pulled out a bunch of flowers.

 

“These are for you,” he said handing my daughter a bouquet that consisted of a combination of mixed flowers.

Her smile got wider. “Thank you,” she whispered then turned to be awestruck.

“Mom he bought me flowers. Flowers.”

“Yes he did,” I said. “Let me take them and put them in water.”

Taking then I moved towards the kitchen, pleased he had made such an effort. When I brought back the flowers I placed them in the middle of the coffee table which was between Radley, Kylie and Mr. Divine who was sitting along with Radley’s father. Mr. Divine had exercised his slick investigation methods and whatever he had discovered had him smiling.

“Honey, they are going to watch ‘Wonder Woman’,” he said. “That should be interesting. I can hardly wait to hear how it was.”

By the time the conversation was completed, the decision was made that we would pick up the kids at ten o’clock to drive them home.

When they left Mr. Divine flopped back into the couch like a marionette whose strings had been cut.

“Watching her walk through that door felt like I was getting the skin ripped off my body with tweezers,” he gasped pulling me into his arms and holding me tight.

I understood his pain. “Me too. I feel like rushing out of the house to follow them.”

I laughed holding him tighter. “Please don’t put ideas into my head because I will be more than tempted to follow them.”

Getting comfortable I closed my eyes and let Mr. Divine hold me. Ten o’clock was going to take forever to come but until then I would let my little girl enjoy her first date.

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Date Prep

 

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We found the perfect outfit. Photo by Artificial Photography on Unsplash

With permission granted, Kylie and her young man have chosen where and when they plan to go on their date. The plan is he would pick her up from our house to go out, then we would pick them up from where they ended up going to watch the movie. My young lady was beyond excited about the upcoming day, and after we had a talk and got a new outfit she became a lot more settled.

We got her a cute peasant top with blues and reds that she planned to wear with jeans or the new pants we got to go with it. When the afternoon came, Kylie came to me and hugged me tightly. “Help me get ready,” she begged, trying to keep her excitement under control.

“You’ll be fine. Go start getting ready and I’ll help you finish.”

She tried not to rush off to start but in truth she did and after about half an hour she came back dressed in the shorts and top we had bought.

When she stepped out of her room and walked down the corridor to me I was blown away. I had to fight not to cry.

“You look so beautiful baby,” I hugged her tight then sat her down.

“You don’t need makeup but we have that really pretty lip gloss that we bought when we went shopping.”

Together we sorted out a hairstyle then did her face with a light dusting of translucent powder and the lip gloss.

“Perfect,” I said sitting back to see how she looked. “All ready?”

She gave me a shy smile. “All ready. Thanks for helping me mom. It may not look it but I’m so nervous.”

“Just be the amazing you that you are,” I whispered to her as there was a knock on the door. It was time for my baby to go on her first date.

Telling Them No

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‘No’ means ‘No’. Photo by Cooper Smith on Unsplash

As Kylie and I kept talking I switched to a delicate topic that needed to be addressed even if I didn’t want to bring it up.

 

“Do you remember the incident that caused us to transfer you to your new school?”

“Yes,” she whispered. It was a topic she wasn’t fond of but she knew what I had to say was important if I brought it up.

“It’s not always guys that you are not involved with that don’t understand or listen when you say no, but also some guys that you like and you go out with on a date sometimes think they have the right to take more than you are willing to offer. If you say no, say it and mean it and make sure anything you don’t like comes to a stop.”

She looked at me with wide eyes and bit her lips. “That is why we insisted you go for a refresher self-defense course. If you say no and someone does not listen. Make them understand ‘No’ means ‘No’. Don’t hesitate. Do what you must and find help at once.”

The conversation and the questions continued for the rest of our outing and by the end of it all, Kylie understood more about sex. The lies people told about it and to get it. The need to understand more about her body and the fact she should always listen to it and take note of its reactions. I explained that she had a lot to learn and I was here, ready and willing to answer any question she had.

I knew Kylie was a thinker but I was aware how easy it was for a smooth-talking boy to turn your head. After all, it happened to me. Time will tell and it is up to her. I just want her to have a better experience than me, so I’ll equip her as best I can for what may come. In this day and age it was the right thing for any responsible parent to do.

Zero Pleasure

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For every woman it is different. Photo by Ahmed Ashhaadh on Unsplash

My conversation was giving Kylie a lot more understanding about the topic of sex. She now understand it was an act but then it was also much more. For several minutes she said nothing but I could tell she was deep in thought trying to figure out what to ask me next.

“Note, guys will tell you almost anything to get you to have sex. For some of them, it’s the conquest and a lot of them will do whatever to get it.”

“Could you explain arousal. What does it feel like?”

“For every woman it is different but the best way I can describe it is a building feeling of eagerness and excitement in both your mind and your body. Also, it is important to know with every woman the degree of arousal varies. When it comes to the body most people just think the main parts, your breasts and vagina but a well-placed touch can lead to arousal. Think of your skin as one huge organ and if some you like touches you. Combined that with the right words and a woman can be aroused. It’s the concept of foreplay. Sadly it is something very few men seem to understand or have mastered, but some are improving.”

We moved around the store in silence for a bit then Kylie took up a top then turned to me. “I like this one? What do you think?”

“Try it on and we’ll see if it works.” She placed it over her hand with the other clothes she held then turned to me.

“Can I ask you a question mom. It’s about dad and my…father.” Soon after we got married the children started called Mr. Divine dad. The first time they did it the man had to fight back tears. He showed then time and again he would protect them no matter what.

“Ask away.”

“I watch you with dad now and think back to the way things used to be with my father. Why do you think he was like that? So cruel and nasty to you.”

“It could be several things. The main one I can come up with is that your father was a selfish and insecure man and the only way he could feel good about himself was to make others feel bad about themselves. He used to do that to me a lot. Make me feel like I was stupid. His aim was to have power over me. It was all about him. That is why I urge you, the day a guy makes you feel bad about yourself, leave him. Leave him at once. It is the beginning of things going from bad to worst.”

“Okay mom,” she whispered hugging me.

“If a guy doesn’t want to take the time with you it is never a good thing. If you want to go slow but he is in a hurry and wants to use guilt on you to get you to do what he wants, that is a bad sign. He does not love you. He never loved you.”

Yes or No

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Mr. Divine made a few calls later on that night then came back to me regarding some information about the young man that had my Kylie smitten. It seems the young man was, in fact, an amazing boy, his father on the other hand, had the reputation of being a true bastard. This situation would have to be dealt with delicately.

If there was one thing I learned from being involved with Walter is that it is a dangerous thing to get into a family you are not totally comfortable with. My ex-husband had come from a secretive family that was always fighting with each other and as a result, he pulled me away from and isolated me from my family. If we allow Kylie to go out this guy, she would learn a lot about people and that all family structures and dynamics we’re not the same.

“What do you think?” Mr. Divide me as we sat on the couch.

“I want to protect my baby but if she is to go off to college I won’t be there to tell her yes or no when it comes to the boys that she meets. She tried to find out as much as she could about him which shows she is thinking rather than blind following or jumping into situations. She needs to keep growing up and discovering.”

Mr. Divine sighed and hugged me closer. “Yes, our baby is growing up, learning.”

“So yes to this date? I asked with a smile.

“Yes,” he said with a sigh. “Before that date, she has to go for a refresher self-defence course. In fact, I’m going to send a message now asking if she can be fit in for Wednesday.”

I laughed at his comment but I knew he was serious. It was better to be ready and aware that clueless and caught. Our young lady was taking another step in her development from there we’ll see what is next.

She Is Growing Up

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After the kids went to bed Mr. Divine and I had a long talk about Kylie’s request to go on a date. She was getting to that age and we needed to allow her to start to understand boys and the way they behaved.

“I want to hide her forever,” whispered Mr. Divine as we moved outside to enjoy the quiet night while we talked, ignoring the that TV played in the background. I climbed between his legs and settled against his chest as his arms cuddled me against him.

“I know,” I replied but she needs to know and understand and experience. The fact she talks to us is important and I would like to keep it that way.”

“Yes,” he said with a sigh.” There is so much insane stuff going on daily it makes you frightened to let your children out the door.”

“The thing is by not letting them out we will do them a huge disservice. There will come one day when we are not there to do everything for them and to protect them.”

“My wife, the brilliant one,” whispered Mr. Divine against my neck.

“Do you your undercover investigation thing. I know that will be the only way you will be completely comfortable,” I murmured.

Mr. Divine’s laughter vibrated against my cheek. “You know me much too well.”