When we last spoke my oldest Kylie was about to go on her first date. To say I was more nervous than her was an understatement but I wanted to make sure I armed my little warrior before she went out. With that in mind, I had a serious talk her about sex. Not the slot A goes into slot B type conversation, but more of conversation about the feelings that go along with the desire to have sex. Some people may be thinking at sixteen, do you think you should be having a conversation like that with a child? Considering that girls are having sex younger and younger, I frankly think my conversation is past due.
I choose a day when Kylie and I were on the way to do some shopping. As we pulled up at the mall intending to go looking for an outfit for her to wear on her date I popped the question.
“Kylie what do you think about sex?”
“Mom?” she questioned. “What do you mean?”
“You understand the basics about sex?”
“I guess so,” she said with a shrug. “You hear stories at school but the truth is I rather get facts and understand more.”
I smiled. “Fact is always good. It was lack of knowledge that worked against me when I got involved with your father. One thing I can tell you is that your father is like a lot of men when it comes to sex. Selfish and only interested in their own pleasure. That is also the way how a lot of young men are as well.
We made our way inside the mall continuing our conversation.
“The thing is with sex and most women, not all, most, they associate or combine sex and love. They give or have sex with someone they think they love. With men, most, again not all, it’s about the pleasure. Their pleasure.”
She looked at me with a puzzled look. “Can’t women have pleasure from sex?”
I smiled at here. I loved how my child always got to the heart of the matter.
“The short answer is yes, but that yes goes along with so many different factors.”
Kylie gave me her ‘well keep talking’ look and as we shopping we kept the conversation going.