The Spoke for my Wheel

 

spoke-in-my-wheel

We wanted to go on vacation as a family.

So I go the jitters. The pre-wedding freak out because I’m asking myself if I’m doing the right thing. I know what I endured during my last marriage and this is what tries to take over my mind and often makes me so afraid to take this important step in my life. Again the fear is trying to stalk me but I know I don’t want to live in that place for the rest of my life.

How did I end up feeling like this? It came about as a result of the complications that came into play due to my evil, spawn of the devil, ex, called Walter. Everything was planned for the wedding and I had even gotten my dress after much deliberation What happened while I got the dress is another story for you to look forward to but for now let me tell you what the idiot did.

The plan for the kids and I was to do some traveling with Mr. Divine and to visit his home to get the…feel for what the area is like. The aim to figure out if it was a place we would consider moving me. The complication, I needed Walter’s permission to take the children out of the country and we were not on speaking terms due to how he behaved when he heard I was getting married. Add to it that, Mr. Divine had insisted on sending Walter a letter from my lawyer to cease and desist his harassment I don’t know how I was going to get his permission to take the children with me.
The whole thing has me worried because there was no way I was leaving my children with that man knowing that he and they were not on the best terms. I had to figure out what to do.

When I contacted my lawyer about the situation, after speaking at length we decided it was best to speak to the judge. Several months back the kids came to the decision they wanted nothing to do with their father and I mean nothing. It all came to a head in the office in the office of the school counselor in front of the principal of both children’s schools. The incident then went to a judge who wanted to insist that the children had to have visitation with their father. The adults said what they had to say then the judge said he was going to make his ruling. That was when my daughter stood up and asked about what she had to say.

“You want to send us to stay with that man.”

“Young lady you are in contempt, you need to be quiet. The adults make the decisions.”

“Yes while the children have to suffer the pain of your bad decisions. I dare you. Send me to that man and in less than a day he will be begging you to change the ruling. I will torment him worst than he tormented us. I promise I will.”

Kylie shot her father a nasty look then looked to the judge.

“I. Dare. You.”

The courtroom was dead silent that day and the judge saw that my daughter was not joking and made the decision not to make visitation necessary. Now I had to go to the same judge about the trip. There was no way we were going to tell this man we were thinking about a permanent move. We would deal with that bridge if we were ever going in that direction, till then it’s about the trip.

When we went to the judge he sighed when he saw us. My daughter also insisted on coming. She wanted to hear every decision that would affect her.

I can hear a lot of other adults saying, “that child needs to know his place’, but think about it. How many times have adults made decisions they don’t talk to children about and it destroys the child’s life? At sixteen, Kylie had the right to know what is happening to her. Unlike a lot of people, I talk to my children. Their opinions actually count.

This time the judge insisted on an aside and spoke to Kylie. They spoke back and forth for more than thirty minutes then the judge came back to the rest of us. He got the paperwork from the lawyer and looked it over.

“Mr. Haynes your children have planned a vacation with their mother and her new husband and I’m granting them permission to go on the trip.”

“Why is it she always getting what she wants and I always get punished?”

The judge turned to Walter. “This is about your children’s lives not winning. I was willing to give you a chance but from what your daughter says you have made no effort.”

“Her mother made her…”

“Your daughter is not stupid and can think for herself and I frankly think that if you were a good father it wouldn’t matter what her mother said about you if you were a good father. You are not the father these children need so until you start exhibiting that you are, it is best that the children stay with their children mother and her new husband.”

The reprimand had Walter fuming but the judge’s word was final. We would be going on vacation and maybe more. In the end, the decision that was made ended up being the best interest of the children, the persons who mattered most in this whole situation.

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